Mall Cop Diary
In(s)ane Ramblings Of A Mall Cop

A Bad Day

It was just a bad day. Sure interesting things happened at the mall today. A girl even waved at me and called me ‘handsome’.

But all that was overshadowed by my incredibly bad day.

First I nearly busted my lungs when I dashed all that way to the bus-stop, only to find out I had forgotten to wear my belt (an essential part of my mall uniform). Too late. The bus just arrived.

Despite sacrificing my belt for the bus, I arrived several minutes late. So I did a Clark-Kent-in-a-phone-booth impression and made it to the exhibition hall from the office in record time. The night guard wasn’t impressed with my effort. Well, I guessed I wouldn’t be impressed either, if I had to wait like 15 minutes for the next shift to take over.

And while I was on the receiving end of a lecture about the importance of punctuality and how night guards have lives as well, I noticed I had forgotten to wear my name tag. I must have left it in the phone booth… erm… I mean changing room.

I apologized to the night guard yet again, and ran off to get my tag. I was sweating like a horse when I got back to the hall and the night guard had a long face like one.

At this point, you might think that would be the end of my bad day, right? Wrong.

Because half-an-hour later, I was peeing in the toilet when I found out that running out of toilet paper is not the only scary thing that can happen in there. I couldn’t zip up. My zip broke, and I couldn’t zip up my pants!

Good thing I was a mall cop, eh? I knew all the secret ways around the mall AND I watched all the ninja movies ever made. I could probably creep silently and invisibly all the way to the office and get … help. But in my panic, I forgot what I knew. I simply dashed to the office from where I was, past my colleagues and all those good-looking cosmetic sales girls.

And I got permission to go home and change into a new pair of pants. It took me nearly 2 hours to get home and back again. And I lost my lunch break.

But yeah, that was the end of my bad day.

By: A Mall Cop

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One Response to “A Bad Day”

  1. Perhaps encountering so many troubles and overcoming them makes you more desirable to women… did you ever think of that? 😉 Blessing in disguise, perhaps.


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